Content warning: the below story contains sensitive information about miscarriage and baby loss that some readers might find upsetting. 

A detective constable has used her own experience of miscarriage to help initiate a Baby Loss Peer Support Group within South Wales.

Federation member Amy Evans is hoping that the recently launched support network will help to ensure people who have experienced baby loss - however long ago - are not alone.

The 40-year-old helped create the group following her own experience of miscarriage when she was 11 weeks pregnant.

“The moment I had a positive pregnancy test, I’d planned the next 18 years of that child’s life. Going through a miscarriage completely tore me apart, it was a rollercoaster of emotions,” said Amy.

Rewind to 2019. Having struggled to get pregnant, Amy and her partner Rhod, who is an inspector in the Force went through two rounds of IVF, the second of which was successful. This led to the couple becoming parents to their three-year-old son Osian.

Amy, Rhod and their son Osian.

Fast forward to 2023 and Amy unexpectedly found out she was pregnant, having conceived naturally.

“We felt very lucky to have Osian, and never, ever thought we could have a child without IVF - and even then, it’s not certain,” said Amy, adding: “So when I found out I was pregnant last year, it was completely out of the blue.

“With Osian being born in lockdown, I’d missed out on so many of those pregnancy milestones, like revealing the news to family. I was so excited when I found out I was pregnant for the second time, we had an early scan and I told close family and friends the news.

Miscarriage

“I was so excited for Osian too - and the idea of him becoming a big brother.”

Sadly, at 11 weeks, Amy - having felt that ‘something just was not right’ - was given the devastating news that she had lost the baby.

“It was horrendous. I’d driven to the scan on my own, which meant I had to drive back having been told the news,” she recalled.

“And because the miscarriage hadn’t started naturally, it had to be medically managed. It was awful.”

Amy says her line managers at the time were ‘brilliant’, allowing her to take the time off from work she needed to come to terms with what happened.

“I remember that time was so lonely,” Amy added.

“My sister had been through a miscarriage, so she was able to support me but that doesn’t take away the sadness. And even though my partner was also experiencing loss, I still felt so alone.”

Baby loss

Over those difficult few months, Amy found comfort in ‘The Worst Girl Gang Ever’, a supported podcast that covers the heartbreaking subject of miscarriage, infertility and baby loss.

Inspired by the podcast, Amy wanted to introduce something similar at South Wales Police.

And so, she teamed up with two colleagues, Alison Robinson and Katie Aubrey, to create and co-ordinate The Baby Loss Peer Support Group.

Police officers and staff, of all genders and ages, can be referred to the group by occupational health, the Force councillor/therapist or their line managers. They can also self-refer via the group email address should they wish.

At that point, one of the 17 volunteers, who support the group and have received training from the charity SANDS (the Stillbirth and Neonatal Death charity) will be in contact with that person, to provide vital support, advice or even just a listening ear, when they need it most.

The group are also on hand to assist line managers who may be supporting a staff member through loss, especially in relation to South Wales Police policies regarding miscarriage and child bereavement.

“The group is there for anyone who has lost a baby, whether through miscarriage or stillbirth, as well as those wanting to support loved ones or colleagues who have experienced miscarriage or baby loss,” explained Amy, adding: “And that can be at any time too - whether a person experienced baby loss recently or years ago.”

Support

The person who has been referred to can choose to receive as much or as little support from the group as they wish, depending on their unique circumstances.

“Even if they don’t want to actually speak with one of our volunteers, we can signpost them to websites, organisations and charities that might be able to offer them the support they need,” said Amy.

“The main point of the group is to ensure people don’t feel alone.

“I know there are some people who find it difficult to see our flyers but it’s important that we continue to speak out about miscarriage and baby loss, so people know that they are not alone.

“We also want to educate our colleagues, so they feel comfortable having conversations around miscarriage and baby loss.”

For more information on the group please email BabyLossPeerSG@south-wales.police.uk or search ‘Baby Loss Support’ on the intranet.

READ MORE: Members are seeking our support earlier says health and safety lead.